Review: Illusion (Swept Away Book 1) by JS Cooper

It wasn’t the blurb that convinced me to pre-order this e-book. It was the first three chapters on Amazon.

The only solace with which I walk away from JS Cooper’s Illusion is that I didn’t fall for the whole cliché of ‘girl trapped on a deserted island with a handsome stranger’. The book did have potential. And an interesting plot that could have been made even more intriguing once Bianca London and Jakob No-Last-Name-For-80%-of-the-book found themselves kidnapped and isolated on an exotic island.

It kills me to read books with potential that go bonkers. Truly it does. Why do authors do this to themselves? But more importantly, why do they do this to us?

Bianca is a freelance film writer who has been looking into her mother’s suspicious death when she was 5-years-old after her father died and left her a bunch of papers and a very curious letter. Things start to get scary when she notices a man stalking her at a coffee shop and then again at a pub. She is soon drugged and stuffed into the trunk of a car with Jakob, a man she’s never really met though he did share a table with her at the coffee shop.

Cut to the deserted island. The duo is left tied up on a beautiful sandy beach with no food, water or clue as to why they’re there. They’re disoriented. But obviously not enough to stop them making sexual advances or noticing the other’s anatomy.

Once they gather their bearings after a few bananas, they sit down to talk over why they may be in this situation. Bianca is convinced that she’s there because she was investigating her mother’s murder which involves her billionaire ex’s company. Jakob wastes no time in revealing that he too is a billionaire but he has no connection whatsoever to said ex. Of course, his avoidance of all personal questions thereafter do hint at the fact that perhaps, he isn’t putting all his cards on the table.

This doesn’t stop our Belle from revealing everything about herself – murder investigation, back story, hopes, dreams, aspirations included. After all, Jakob is pretty. How bad can he be, really?  

The first thing that gets my goat is that this dumb woman doesn’t once ask the man she’s stranded with for his last name. Not once! I mean, come on? Didn’t your parents teach you anything other than to barge unprepared into the line of fire of a potentially evil corporation?

Secondly, another character soon appears on the island. He’s named Steve and is just as shady as Jakob though not as pretty. This is somewhat why Bianca sticks to the latter because, I mean, how can she dismiss the time they spent in the boot of the car together? That’s a real connection, right there.

Third, this Jakob character is a real pervert. Sure they’re on a stranded island and clothes will come off what with the heat, sand and the surf. But seriously. What’s with all the inappropriate touching and staring and sexual comments?

And finally: Why is it that most leading men in erotic romances say things like – a) I don’t do girlfriends; b) If you were mine, I would make sure you never thought of another man ever again; c) I’m dangerous. You should stay away from me; d) I can’t help but feel protective about you. Let’s cuddle (or something similar).

I mean seriously? Are these the guidelines they make you memorise when you venture into the genre? Can these men not be totally good looking assholes for once?

Don’t even get me started on Bianca’s character. You start off thinking she’s a bit clueless and obviously naive, even though she keeps reiterating how hard she finds it to trust people. But then she outdoes herself as we see how the presence of pecks, abs and sky blue eyes turn her into coconut jelly.

The book could have worked if Cooper had just focussed on the plot like she initially promised instead of exploring warped male-female sexual dynamics and how they affect the character’s decision making skills. Bad. Very, very bad!

What she delivers however is a plot ruined so totally by forced erotica, you’re left baffled that this is actually just book number 1 of a “series”. Trust me JS Cooper. It may have worked for EL James. But lighting only strikes once.

God help us all! 

Fifty Shades of Rants

I ordered Fifty Shades of Grey on my Kindle the minute I read the first review published in the Sunday edition of a newspaper. How often do you see erotica glorified in the mainstream? Moreover, how often do you find BDSM mentioned, let alone discussed openly -- on television, online and in the papers -- in India?

The thing about romance and erotica is that while you're reading it, you allow yourself to believe that it's real and taking place in a dimension in which you openly acknowledge your need for escapism. But the minute the book's over, the questions start pouring in.

Why is this protagonist so lacking in confidence? Why is there so much talk of BDSM when all that's taking place is plain vanilla with a hint of dark chocolate? Why is there such a Mills and Boon spin to it -- Oh he doesn't love me, he never will, oh woe is me! -- when it's quite clear that he's completely smitten by her? I guess "my inner Goddess" hates female characters who don't believe in their own prowess, choosing instead to worship strong-willed men believing them to be way out of their league.

There are many schools of thoughts out there with varying opinions, arguments and rants about this novel. Good for you EL James! One of them comes from Sujata, fellow Caterpillar Reshma's Mum! Here's why she believes Flipkart should overhaul their 'You might also like.." software:

"I buy books through Flipkart. And Flipkart decided that I would like to read Fifty Shades of Gray? Maybe? After I finished reading the book I decided that they should definitely overhaul that software.

The title and the cover set you in a mood for that dark and literary writing akin to Josephine Hart, Huxleys, Murakami and others who can can take you on a dark ride with your heart, soul and loins wrung with exquisite roller coaster ride of emotions. Time magazine describes the author as one of the most influential woman and for a first time author this is pathbreaking.

So it was with great expectation that I started reading the book. It was difficult to get past the first chapter and as the book progressed I realized why it was a winner. Hallelujah!!! This was ....a mini booklet of Masters and Johnsons of  "let's do it". I'm sure sales of sex toys and aids has rocketed after the release of this book and the genre is here to stay. Great as a gift to the newly married, to that close friend... welcome to the new world of mommyporn!"

Full review of Fifty Shades of Grey coming up in time for the weekend. Until then, let us know what you think of the book and if you have anything to add to Sujata's piece. 


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Review | The Japanese Lover by Rani Manicka

I love sagas. There is nothing better than watching a young pretty girl blossom into an obnoxious teenager, mature into a confused single twenty-year-old and age gracefully into a corporate tycoon all in the space of a weekend. You guessed it - every Daniel Steele heroine ever written. This particular tale starts off in a promising albeit strange manner. We meet an old woman living in the storeroom of her daughters house in Kuala Lumpur when someone asks her to record her life story and so Parvati is born into a poor Sri Lankan family. On eve of her birth a grim prophesy is told of a doomed marriage to an extremely wealthy man. To avert this fate she bathes a golden serpent in milk every day and is locked in the shed behind her house by her father until the wealthy man from the country of Malaya comes knocking at her door.

Here the story takes a more predictable turn as she travels to the distant land and embarks on a difficult journey to fit into Kasu Marimuthu's life, my favorite character in the novel, and play with the strange cards she has been dealt. Namely a witch doctor cook and an altogether depressing disposition. You have to give it to Rani Manicka in that it takes guts to create a character this lacking in well, character. There is absolutely nothing extraordinary about her. She is tone deaf, has no interest in art and comes across as any ordinary village girl should. The essence of the story from then on out is her entry into Malaya social scene- a Princess Diaries meets My Fair lady meets Beauty and the Beast that is really quite enjoyable until you find the story lacking any direction after the predictable transformation takes place. You can sense the author's conundrum as she  as she begins to throw in a possible love affair, mysticism and family drama into the mix unable to fuse each story thread together in a believable manner. At one end she is cursed with a utterly terrible children and on the other has to deal with a  constant undercurrent of superstition that somehow never comes together. Once the Japanese general enters, he brings with him a much needed outlet for releasing tension that Manicka builds up quite nicely but is unable to execute. While Parvati's sudden sexual awakening could have been more fully explored, I do love Manicka's lovely way with erotica. A particular scene with Parvati in the ocean was almost orgasmic as are her surreal moments as a Geisha. The book flap talks about a how Parvati had to choose the man who was her sworn enemy as her lover, something I thought should have taken more than the one paragraph that it happened in. The mysticism and supernatural elements continue to linger until it culminates in some sort of serpent frenzy that completely goes over my head and over Parvati's as well.

This could have been an amazing book if Manicka had made it longer and given it that space to develop as it deserved. I would have loved to know more about the history of the time and the broader Malay landscape. I really did want to like Parvati but felt like I was never given the chance between the magic realism and Japanese invasion. The writing is always fluid and you get a lovely sense of this beautiful house by the beach and the jungles near by. The humour of the mami's afforded me the occasional laugh and her matter of fact third person view point keeps us involved even us story threads confuse us. Perhaps the most interesting parts were the authors take on India and Indians. Manicka when asked about this said; "For me, this is a message to Indians in this country because they really do have a self-esteem problems and they deny it whenever I speak about it. It is so ingrained in them. With this book, I am saying it is okay if you are dark skinned."

I am never a fan of novels that are overtly preachy but part of me does like the fact that a main theme of this book is that dramatic lives can happen to even the most ordinary people.

Verdict: Worth a read on a rainy afternoon. Pass it around your girlfriends, especially the ones that live with mami's.
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